You may be rich and famous, you may have all the wealth a man could gain, but still, you could feel this eery feeling of emptiness and unfulfillment. Why? Why is it so that those who we seem as having the perfect lives still seem to be depressed and contained within the cold grasp of fear?
I’d summarise this thing with one sentence
You can fool the world, but you can never feel yourself
It’s the harsh truth that many would want to be a lie. We can all dress in the finest silks and drive the fastest cars, but if we feel cold and empty inside, all the physical wealth is rendered meaningless.
So, how can you find your inner self in the modern world where everyone tries to be something as if we’d be required to show that we exist and gain the approval of others.
Well, my dear reader, I’ll share my thoughts with you and may they guide you to the right path.
No matter what happens to us, we still hold the core flame within us. It’s the flame, the purest flame God himself crafted for us. It is us, but life is not always as bright as the flame, thus, it can fade and be left behind in a place we can no longer reach it.
My past is filled with bullying, loneliness, and dark days. It has taken me a lot of energy and dedication to get on the path which leads to my true identity and though I’ve done a lot of progress, I still feel like I’m missing something; that I’m still holding onto a mask that I got used wearing.
So, bullying can dramatically change one’s perception of their self. The things people expect from us can become the doom of ourselves as we try to adapt and change in order to become the right person.
Being different is seen as a curse, a plague that destroys lives and the horrible truth is that those who wield unique traits, thoughts, dreams, and skills are easily cast out from the class, from the friend group, and from the team. This may cause the one being thrown out to question themselves, ask what is so wrong with them that others want to get rid of them.
After the trauma has formed in one’s mind and the demands that the people around us have gotten deep into our soul, we may start changing.
Just to set things straight, change doesn’t automatically mean bad. If you’ve acted like a bad person, it’s a vital thing for you to change your behaviour in order to have a good life. But the change I’m talking is the one’s doing to their true identity, their character.
This kind of change may show results. One can become popular, liked by others and accepted into the group as an equal, but here’s the thing:
Though one can feel appreciated at the moment, when he realizes he’s not himself, it will all be for nothing.
I changed a lot during my school years. I tried to fit in, get friends, and be accepted, liked, maybe even loved.
But when I realized I was not who I truly was, I got even sadder and the grief was immense. People loved this other person, but not the real me, thus, nothing had changed, but I had still lost the sight of my true identity.
I’m the kind of person who wants to know the truth, no matter how hard it is. I’d rather be told my partner is cheating on me than to be left in the fake happiness. This relates to our subject, for who’d really want to live in a fake life when in truth, their real self is not appreciated or even seen?
So, how can one change themselves back to the person they once were. How can we discover the flame that we all have inside us and find meaning to our lives?
I have a few things you should consider:
First of all: Stop thinking what others think of you/what they expect of you.
If you’re constantly thinking about how others see you or how they’d wish you to act like, you’re not listening to yourself. You can be surrounded by countless friends, but if you have a raging battle in your mind, you’re not really happy.
We all have those times when a quiet voice speaks to us. It may direct us to do something, like paint, write, play an instrument. It may guide us to do something we may find foolish, but I say, trust that voice.
That voice comes from your core. You’ve just ignored it so many times that it has lost its volume and shrunk to become a small and quiet voice, thus, making it hard for us to realize its existence.
But when you start listening to it and doing as it says, it will grow stronger and soon, you start feeling like you’re alive again.
This mysterious voice was the thing that guided me towards writing in the first place. I ignored it for years on end, but when I finally sat down and wrote, my entire life changed. I was reminded writing was my destiny and it made me find purpose and direction for my life.
Second of all: Remember that you’re a masterpiece
We rarely say horrible things to other people, but when we stand in front of a mirror, we may unleash a terrible storm of negativity upon us.
Remember that you’re a wonderful person. You have talents and skills that others may not see, but even if they’d be ignorant, it doesn’t make you a lesser person.
Be proud to be who you are. If all your friends want to go on the generic education path, while you want to start a business, don’t make your plans somewhat less importance.
I’ve noticed many people saying bad things about others’ dreams simply because they’re jealous. They’re jealous of the fact that you have a dream. You have a plan that’s different from the safe and widely accepted one.
Those are my thoughts about this. I don’t think there is a magical pill that will suddenly guide yourself back to your core, but I do think that these things that I shared with you will help you rediscover that lost path.
In the end, it’s about listening to yourself, your true self, not allowing other people to get into your head and destroy your identity or change it in a way you don’t really find good.
Be proud to have different goals and dreams. Dream big and work with passion, for one day you’ll sit on that throne and gaze down upon those who tried to change you to become a mindless slave to fear. At that moment, you’ll be thankful to yourself that you didn’t give up, that you kept going and rediscovered yourself.
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