From A Bullied Man To A Published Author
I’ve always been a creative person. I’ve crafted things with my own hands, I’ve composed the music of all genres, I’ve made movies, businesses, radio stations… I have created many things since I was young and I keep creating to this very day.
But how did I end up like this? Why did writing become such a big part of my life? Why becoming an author turned out to be my destiny?
I’ll tell you my own story, so stay awhile and listen.
I’m the firstborn son of a big family. I was an energic and innovative child, always creating something and going somewhere, rarely worrying about things and always believing in the goodness of the world.
My faith has always been a big part of my identity, for my family is a faithful family. My grandfather, whom I loved dearly, was a priest for most of his life and I still remember the stories he used to tell me when he came over.
But as you know, no character can grow without conflict, thus, conflict arose in my life.
My entire school career has been plagued by bullying. Since the first grade, I’ve always been the bullied, outcasted boy. I’ve always been laughed at, called with names, and even physically harmed, but no amount of physical harm could compare to the psychological pain I felt.
Thus, after years went by, I fell into deep and silent depression. I had just recently discovered games and computers, and I was immediately hooked by fantasy games such as Warcraft 3 and World of Warcraft. I spent my days playing, watching Lord of the Rings, and reading all kinds of books. I wanted to escape from my dark reality.
When I went to school, I was the unwanted outcast, but when I logged into World of Warcraft, I became a wanted champion of justice and light. It made me feel good about myself, even though when I closed the game, the feeling vanished.
As the years went by, I tried many different forms of art. I made movies, started my own lemonade stands until I finally started making electronic music.
For a long time, I thought music was my destiny. I dreamt of becoming a great EDM star, like Deadmau5 or Tiesto. I wanted to be the popular guy, playing to millions of people and being admired, being liked. Gaining recognition was my goal, which ended up blurring my actual composing.
For years, I made music in hopes of gaining success and finally being liked, but I slowly began to realize that I wasn’t actually enjoying the process of making music. I did it to be liked, not because I loved the creative process itself.
Since I was young, I loved fantasy stories. Warcraft and Lord of the Rings were my favourite fictional worlds and I dreamt of creating a world of my own. I wanted to create those epic scenes where characters would fight and gain tragic ends, but the problem was, I feared that if I would give in to this call, I’d become even less liked, for the people of my age didn’t see writing as a “cool” thing to do.
Thus, I ignored my calling, forcing myself to make music in hopes of getting accepted, but as time went on, I slowly realized it wouldn’t happen.
My grandfather was an author as well. He allowed me to write with his typewriter and I used to write some stories with it. He gave me the inspiration to write and I admired him deeply. He gave me spiritual guidance and showed me my dream career, even when it took a while for me to understand it.
After my Grandfather passed away after fighting cancer for years, I looked at my life once again. I had felt the call to write for years since I was a little boy, but I had always thrown it away.
I placed others higher than myself, wanting to please them and gain their acceptance until I woke up and said, “enough!”
I began writing, no matter the quality, and as I wrote and wrote, I realized how much I liked the actual process of writing. I loved creating characters, worlds, and stories. I realized how much I spent time writing and how hours went by like seconds.
Writing was the first thing I did for the sake of doing it. I didn’t have a goal to gain fame or acceptance from my peers. I simply wrote because I loved it and it felt good.
And so we return to this day. I’ve published a book and I’m working on my big fantasy series I’ve been planning for almost eight years. I’ve been writing a blog for almost a year, which had been a big dream of mine for years, and I’ve finally found my creative voice and an art form I truly love.
My goal is to write stories that inspire people. I want to change the world, not with swords, but with words.
And when I sit down and write, I thank my grandfather for showing me the way and wonder how he would react to me publishing a book.
This is my story, through battles and darkness, I’ve come to this point. I’ve been at the bottom, afraid and alone, but writing has pulled me up, giving me a sense of direction and purpose. I hope you feel inspired about my story.
I wish you find the strength to find your own path and walk it without fear. Remember, you are meant for greatness, no matter how others see you.
Keep walking your own path, for it’s the only way for you to find happiness.
If you want to join my journey, check out my other posts and consider following my blog! My deepest thanks to all of you, my dear readers and remember to follow your own calling!